MY DEPRESSION
I’ve been a blogger for 2 years but this particular article was
really painful to write because I’m far too familiar with the topic.
No, this title is not a mistake and not a lie.
I took me 2 weeks to beat depression after suffering for 6 months and today I’m trying to explain how I did it.
Although I can’t promise it will work as quickly with you, I will tell
you exactly how I did it and why I think it did work. Then you can try
it for yourself.
In the beginning of 2015 I quit my well paid job to pursue my dream
of being my own boss and owning my own brand. I had only 6 months worth
of savings but I knew I will make things work. My enthusiasm was
unparalleled, I worked and worked, didn’t exercise, didn’t socialize,
didn’t sleep enough. I was literally all-in on this because I didn’t
want to go back to being a corporate slave.
But betting all your cards on one lucky number is dangerous. One day
in the end of June 2015 I got one rejection too many and everything fell
apart. I remember I suddenly lost all hope and desire to try any more.
This had never happened before. I didn’t want to read, to meet friends,
to eat, to watch movies, to play guitar, to draw, to blog. Everything I
adored started losing its meaning. It took me a month to realize I was
suffering from a
major depression. Then came:
- Complete insomnia (for months)
- Severe stomach problems (I could only eat bananas and biscuits and I gradually lost 16 pounds)
- Crippling indecision (took me hours to decide what to wear and whether to pick up the phone)
- IQ meltdown (I lost my job, could hardly form sentences and started forgetting words)
- Devastating regret (what I haven’t done and haven’t tried as I was
sure my life was over and I would never do or try those things)
- Absolute numbness (I watched my family cry for me and I couldn’t feel anything)
- Panic (I incessantly tried to read and think myself out of depression and it made it worse and worse)
I was hopeless. It was so hard, that my mind kept telling me the world would be a better place without me. I’ve
never said
this before to anyone but I was suicidal for 5 months. The only thing
that stopped me take my own life was fear and the aforementioned
indecision. Which I hated myself for. I could never in a lifetime
explain the suffering I was going through.
But believe it or not, I’m still here. And this article IS a
happy-end story. Because one day I tried something new and for the first
time in 5 months I felt something changing in my brain.
I felt hope and calmness.
For 5 months I had read every article and tried several pills, every
meditation technique, exercise and therapy I found and nothing ever
helped. Until I watched a short video on the web where a depression
victim shared how he had survived a paralyzing depression.
He said he tricked his own brain into believing he was OK using a visualization technique.
Which sounded like nonsense but he elaborated on what he did and how
his subconscious reacted so I gave it a try that same evening. Lucky for
me, I felt something clicking, so I kept doing it.
In a week I could sleep again. In another week I could eat and
exercise. Only a month after I started that visualization technique
(we’ll get to it shortly), I could work and found a new job. And as I’m
prone to depression and introversion and feared it might come back, I
decided that I will dissect HOW on Earth I recovered and WHY.
MY COMEBACK
Every single doctor I went to told me I would need 6-12 months to
start eating, sleeping and working again. That is IF I started
recovering today but I had only been getting worse over the last 5
months.
But here I was, a week after starting the visualizations, starting to
get my sleep back. Then working out and eating normally in another
week. Then getting a new job and feeling better than I’ve ever felt.
That same night I tried the visualization technique,
I FELT BETTER after just 15 min. of practice. I hadn’t felt better for months. The visualization itself is so simple that most people I’ve told it to haven’t try it (don’t be that guy):
You visualize that you’re feeling better and you get better. The only tricky thing was:
- Understanding WHY it works, which gives you the reason behind it and faith it could help you too (otherwise it will never have an affect)
- Learning HOW to do it right (otherwise you’ll give up before it starts working)
WHAT EXACTLY IS THIS VISUALIZATION TECHNIQUE
The human brain is both amazingly powerful and amazingly simple. Long
story short, it has two frequencies of work: conscious and
subconscious. Out of 150 000 years of evolution, only the last 4000 –
12000 have been governed by the conscious mind. It’s easy to imagine
most of our brain capacity and potential is still hidden in our
subconscious. And it is. It rules all of our emotions, thoughts,
feelings, enzyme and hormone secretion, etc.
Depression (as OCD, anxiety attacks, etc.) is a reaction of the
subconscious brain to excessive stress. I can’t bold that enough:
You’re depressed because your subconscious has undergone or is undergoing too much stress.
There you go: To recover, you only need to unwind and relax it. Which is both awfully hard and very simple.
But first – Why.
Why does stress cause our brains to malfunction?
Because 150 000 years of evolution have trained us that stress =
danger. Stress strengthens concentration, reactions and
pattern-recognition to escape danger. So it’s in fact a good thing, in
small doses. But today we’re constantly overworked, underslept and
unhappy, which make stress far greater than ever. It accumulates in our
brain until it puts it out of order. Because to feel constantly stressed
means you feel in constant danger. Your brain logically shuts off
non-vital functions like metabolism, sleep, emotions, serotonin and
dopamine production (happiness hormones). You don’t need to be happy
when a bear is chasing you and you’re running for your life.
It sounds silly, but it’s true.
The subconscious takes
everything literally. It doesn’t make a difference between real danger
and too much stress over a too long period.
Don’t hate it for doing what it does. In fact, now that you know that, you can turn things around, just like I did.
HOW IT WORKS
Like I said, your subconscious takes everything literally. It has no
eyes. It cannot make a difference between real danger and feeling in
danger.
But here’s the key:
It makes no difference between what’s real and what’s vividly imagined. This
is equally true for positive emotions. If you can picture (or remember)
being on the Eiffel Tower in Paris down to the last detail, your brain
believes it 100%.
Let’s summarize: If you can really make your subconscious feel you’re
getting better, you’ll start getting better. Probably fast.
Now we’re left with How. And here it gets better. And even more logical:
Your subconscious is the far faster and more powerful part of your
brain. So powerful that it can heal you if only you choose to listen and
speak its own language. But it doesn’t speak English. It speaks through
our intuition (emotions, pictures). And it doesn’t understand English.
Again, it understands emotions and vivid images.
If you intentionally project a different reality to it though
visualizing things differently, it quickly starts believing you and
seeking proof for those new beliefs.
Here’s how to make the visualizations:
1.
Visualize your life with no sign of depression.
Down to the last detail – what kinds of things you do, with whom you do
them, how you look, where you hang out, how you feel, how you’re
dressed, what new thoughts you think, how much energy you have.
2.
Engage all your 5 senses. Imagine what the air
feels like on your skin, what your favorite person smells like, what
that delicious desert you’re eating tastes like, what that great song
you’re listening to sounds like. Remember – you need to persuade
yourself this is reality, if only for a while.
3.
Do it in the present tense. Ignore this only
being in your head and visualize all this happening now, in front of
you, feeling awesome. It feels stupid at first, but I’m telling you – if
this made me believe I could sleep and eat again, it can make YOU
recover too.
4.
Be patient. At first you might not do it well, so
it might not work right away. But learning how to control your brain
will change your life forever. Give it some time and patience. In my
case 2 weeks were enough to get me back on my feet, feeling better than
ever (not joking – Better. Than. Ever.) In your case it might be a
little more, but it’s worth every second invested in it.
5.
Feel free to dream. There are no boundaries here.
Visualize your life normal again, filled with positive people,
adventures, great friends and lots of love. Anything that makes your
subconscious feel better, so it starts releasing the happiness hormones
again.
6.
Write it down! Writing makes visualizations
slower, which in its own turn makes them more mindful. The first time I
felt the change happening in my brain, I wrote it down. For the first
week, I wrote it down every day, then I started updating it once a week
and kept that habit for months.
7.
Do it twice a day. Trying to trick your brain is tricky itself. First, it needs repetition and devotion. Don’t skip and if you accidentally do,
NEVER skip twice (until you’ve recovered). Also,
do it when you wake up and before you go to bed.That’s when you’re sleepy because your logic’s resistance is weaker then and your subconscious is more open to “inception”.
8.
If you can’t visualize, try this: Pick a small
object at home, hold it in your hand and study it from all sides for a
minute. Then close your eyes and try to visualize every detail of it.
Repeast 2-3 times every day, change objects if you want. This will make
you better at visualizing.
DON’T DO IT ALONE !!!
This is so important that I’ve put it separately.
You need help and support. Depression is an awful enemy.
Find a depression partner or a mentor to
walk with you, step-by-step until you can “walk” by yourself. Someone
who understands what you’re going through (any experience with
depression is a great benefit) and will have your back no matter
what. Try doing the visualizations together.
If you don’t have such a person,
DROP ME AN EMAIL at j@milanoff.com. I can’t talk to everyone personally, but I will send you the link to my
40-page GUIDEBOOK
that will walk you step-by-step through my whole routine while
recovering – my visualizations, my self-talk, the physical and mental
exercises I did, plus a few crucial habits I developed to make my
recovery faster.
I don’t collect emails, I just seriously favor this method of
helping people rather than just providing a link. The Guidebook needs
some explanation, plus this way I can also send each person a few pieces
of advice based on their specific situation.
Each chapter in the Guidebook focuses on a simple habit that helps
you take control over your mind chemically and psychologically.
Visualizations are one of them, as well as stress reduction, keeping
yourself busy, proper exercise and regaining self-esteem. I try to
explain how and why I believe those habits work universally and give you
my step-by-step program for applying them.
Note: The Guidebook is paid but only $9.90 and only
to cover for those hours I take away from my paying job every day
to reply to tens of emails from people fighting with depression, just
like you.
Those funds are what’s helping me help others. That’s less than what your breakfast usually costs for something that may turn your life around.
If you can’t afford it, I will send you the link for free! BUT please be honest, your support is crucial for my work – I know you wouldn’t take advantage of my help.
To everyone that supports my efforts, I also send a gift – my copy of
one of the best books ever published on finding internal peace and
changing your self-talk to positive. It’s mind-shifting.
So that’s it. That’s my story. I know it seems a bit too spiritual,
that’s why I’ve put all the reason behind those “mystical” effects of
visualizing. NOW IT’S YOUR TURN. You’re on your way to recovery. It’s
not easy but it’s simple!
I hope you’ve decided to
try the visualizations above (please
do!) – they were the most crucial part of my recovering. But if you
want to dig deeper into my recovery methods, JUST SEND ME AN EMAIL at j@milanoff.com with the subject “Guidebook” and I’ll send you the order link.
If you don’t believe me (a few people even called sharing the
darkest moments of my life a scam, which awfully hurt me), PLEASE give
the visualizations a try for a week. You will feel the difference. Don’t blow your chances on recovery because you’re skeptic.
Source: http://milanoff.com/en/recovering-1/